A New Year is a New Opportunity

Making a New Year’s resolution list fills you with hope for the future. Determination and energy jumpstart the year, and you check off every box with triumph and satisfaction. At least, that’s what you hope to gain from your list. But let’s take a minute to talk about the culture around that infamous New Year’s resolution list. People often choose to make goals such as losing weight, reading a lot of books, getting a job promotion, traveling more, etc. There are often lofty goals without a plan, followed by a ton of guilt if those goals aren’t reached. Or, people just give up on their list. However, there is a much healthier way to celebrate the New Year and make great goals for yourself that will make you feel good and help you bring about the change you wish to see.

What type of goals should I set?

There are lots of things we all want to accomplish, but it’s best to start the year thinking of more attainable goals that you can be consistent with. Goals such as saving $100 a month, going to the gym twice a week. Don’t set goals that make you focus on the destination. Make goals that allow you to more easily plan a journey for yourself so you stay dedicated. Simply saying that you want to save $5,000 for the year is awesome, but if you are constantly thinking about the huge end goal, it might be discouraging when you only have $500 in your account. Same goes for making weight loss goals. If you set a goal to lose 40 pounds, you will be focusing on the wrong thing. Instead, try to increase your activity, make small changes in your diet, etc.

What does a realistic goal look like?

If a goal requires you to make drastic life changes like a brand new routine, a brand new diet with none of your comfort foods, or never buying the things you enjoy, then it might be best to break that goal down. A lot of times, people abandon their resolutions simply because they’re changing too much too fast. Change is good, but sticking to a bunch of different new things instead of just changing one thing at a time will lead to frustration and deprivation. If you want lasting changes, you need to focus on one change at a time, and make sure it’s something you can transition into. Instead of deciding to wake up every morning at 5:00 AM to have time to start your day before work, just start waking up 30 minutes earlier than you normally do. After a month once you’ve adjusted, set your alarm for another 30 minutes earlier. Train your body to get more used to that early start time without forcing it.

Okay, this goal seems realistic, but what if I don’t reach it?

Let’s use one of the most common goals on a resolution list for this example: weight loss. Going on a weight loss journey is stressful and difficult. You have to change so much in order to get results, and consistency is the hardest part of that. Every body is unique, and losing 40 pounds may not be as attainable for you as it is for someone else. There are so many factors involved. If a goal like that seems unrealistic or if you’re not seeing the results you want, try focusing on slower changes. Don’t cut out all chocolate from your diet. Just start limiting yourself. If you normally eat four pieces of chocolate a day, limit it to two. After a few weeks, limit it to one. After a few more weeks, you could limit it to one chocolate every other day.

Most importantly, if you don’t feel like you’re making progress towards your resolutions, do not feel guilty or bad about yourself. Change is not easy, and that is okay. There might even be times when you progress really far and take a few steps back. Change is not linear. If the goals you set are not happening, then adjust the goals. It’s not you!

What about self improvement goals? How do I even begin?

Making goals about your personal development, your character, or your mental health can be tricky. How do you tell yourself that you want to be happier by the end of 2024? You really can’t. Let’s go back to the idea of making goals based on the journey instead of the destination. If you want to “be happier” this year, consider making small changes in your life that will lead to you feeling happier more often. If it’s hard for you to have a good day because the house is messy, start integrating 30 minutes a day in your schedule for just picking up around the house. If you feel tired and it keeps you from enjoying time with your friends or going out, try going to bed an hour early every night. It might seem like common sense, but so many people miss those small things they could do to work towards larger goals.

This is the most important thing to remember!

Be kind to yourself. Resolutions are fantastic ways to jumpstart some change in your life, but if you don’t make all of them, it is okay. In fact, maybe you should try kinder goals such as giving yourself more time to rest or working on being more compassionate with yourself. Make it a goal to change how you talk to yourself when you don’t reach a goal or if you take a few steps back on your journey. It’s most important that you love yourself and give yourself space.

What if the changes you need to make are just too big?

It’s so easy to talk about resolutions and goals if you don’t experience depression, anxiety, or other huge difficulties that are normal to experience in life. It’s easy to say you’ll go to the gym three times a week if it isn’t excruciating to get out of bed. It’s easy to say you’ll start going to bed an hour earlier if your anxiety doesn’t keep you staring wide-eyed at the ceiling and your heart racing.

But you are not alone.

The best thing you can do for yourself, the most attainable resolution you can ever have: asking for help. We can be there to help you on your journey. If you’d like to speak someone and make your goal just improving your mental health, reach out and let us know.

Happy New Year!